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Male chastity has to be one of the most liberating, exhilarating and fulfilling lifestyles you can imagine, and having lived it with my husband, John, for the past 2 1/2 years now, I share this insight with you from my personal experience. But like anything worth doing or achieving, it does take some time, effort, planning and forethought to get it right. And by "right", I mean something that's right for you, not something that's necessarily endorsed or "approved of" by other people who have different ideas from you when it comes to deciding how it "should" be done. The first thing you need to decide is... What do you actually want from the lifestyle? If you or your husband genuinely don't want long-term male chastity and orgasm denial, and instead prefer gentle chastity play over an evening or even a couple of days, then there's no point in investing hundreds of dollars for a hand-crafted made-to-measure stainless steel chastity belt. However, should your preferred aim, as mine is, be to have your husband locked firmly in male chastity for a number of months at a time, you will in all likelihood need a more hard-wearing device than one made of plastic (although not always: I know at least one man who wears one of these more or less 24/7 with no problem, and he finds it very effective. In contrast, my husband, John, not only found these simple devices uncomfortable, but he could pleasure himself while wearing them!). Assuming you're going for the longer term, and, in truth, most couples even if they start off intending only to "play", generally gravitate towards longer and longer periods of denial as they realise the enormous benefits it can bring to them both, then usually a full belt is the best choice for most couples in most circumstances. These belts are hand-crafted and made to measure specifically for your husband. What's more, they can cost literally hundreds of dollars and you're on a waiting list of anywhere up to six months. This level of undertaking calls for you to be truly interested in getting a taste for what male chastity can do for you both. It's not something you can simply jump into for a couple of days and get a good feel for it. I believe if your husband expects you to put all this work in to give him what he wants he should be prepared to let you have those keys for at least a year. This isn't to say you have to deny his orgasms for a year (although there's no reason not to, as I'll explain in a moment), but I does mean he has to agree he will allow you to control his orgasms for at least that long before he can back out of it. I'd go even further and recommend you don't even discuss it with him seriously unless he meets this critical criterion. The reason I say this is not to be heartless, but because I know that, with rare exception, the first few days or weeks of male chastity are very tough for a man. He'll ask for mercy, and you'll give in. But then in a few weeks or days, he'll be bugging you about it again. If you think I'm being mean, just put it into the frame of a common experience to many people: he's got a new job and it means you moving to a new area, a new town, a new state, or even a new country. And what does he say? "Just give it a year and if you still feel the same way, we'll come back". That's fair. And so is demanding he gives male chastity a fair try, too. After all, it's more effort and responsibility for you than you might at first realise, and you're putting a lot of time and money into it. Finally to get the most out of it... Be realistic in your expectations! Although it is exciting and fun, and does indeed have effects out of proportion to the time and effort you have to put into it, male chastity doesn't stop "real life" from crowding in on you just like it does now. It's not a short-cut to Nirvana. The chances are you'll get 80% of the fun and benefits in just 20% of the time you spend doing it. This means your lover (because he's got his lust burning away and bottled up) is going to be frustrated and bored for long periods of time. This is normal, to be expected, and precisely what he asked for. Male chastity and giving you command of his orgasms means just that: you have control. It's all consensual so he can back out if he wants to, but then you can refuse to play, too, can't you? But show some appreciation of his feelings. Don't get bitchy and short tempered with him if he seems to be bothering you about his needs and desires. Try to keep a smile on your face and, when appropriate, remind him of what he asked for and the year he agreed to (if he's grumpy, save these comments until he's calmed down - this isn't worth fighting about). Above all, remember you're sharing this experience, just as you're sharing your lives together. You are probably doing this because you want to be closer, have more fun and become more loving and intimate with one another. Male chastity is something you do with someone, not to them. Keep that in mind, and you'll stay on the right road.
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Sarah Jameson, is the host and author the renowned Male Chastity Blog. Happily married and strictly monogamous, she now keeps her partner, John, in rigid permanent male chastity in a stainless-steel chastity belt. She first uncovered the secrets of male chastity some 2 1/2 years ago but was horrified at the low quality of information available on the subject. She now writes extensively on the subject to assist men and women new to male chastity make informed decisions. You can get your own copy of Sarah's FREE guide to male chastity "Why He Wants You To Say 'No!'" from her Blog. Get a Unique Version of this Article Article Spinner
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